Grand Canyon: A bigger hole than Birmingham!

i don’t think theres a person on the planet who hasn’t had their socks blown off the first time they peer over the edge of this stunning wonder of the world. words can not describe the shear size and ore of this brutal open wound in the heart of the arizona desert. the colorado river, the tiny trickle at the bottom that twists and wriggles its way through the 24-mile (best chunk) chasm, is solely responsible for this remarkable piece of erosion. with the highest point of the burnt umber precipice towering 6200 feet, you can see how time and water and weather can defeat any geological challenge.

natural hard engineering like this litters the whole desert lands area, with the equally impressive bryce and zion national parks lurking behind the statuesque buttes. a thousand cowboys and indians have chased each other through these valleys and cacti spotted passes, with or without a camera crew in tow.

you can approach the canyon on highway 15 after a heinous time in vegas, with a welcome stop off at the hover dam if you feel like lobbing things down a big hole. there is also a similar diversion in the et highway where sad losers with badges on their hats look at light in the sky. these lights are only visible to them, as they are mentally insane.

the are is swarming in high tech military bases and accounts for all the strange sightings that are unexplained. there are some seriously paranoid yanks lingering around here that wont stop going on about back engineering (using ufo bits) and seem to think they are the chosen ones who will be whisked away from their dull boring lives (a common trait in abductees and spotters alike).
even mulder and scully don’t drive out this way to the end of highway 51 near broom lake.

route 66 from the east via flagstaff is the trendy way in and the most scenic by all accounts. although the small town is home to the astronomical observatory that first spotted the comet that twated Jupiter.You can have free guided tours and a look through the massive scope if you fancy something different.

This option also offers you a chance to see another big hole of a genuine extra-terrestrial nature. The Meteor crater near Winslow that was used by NASA for moon simulations is well worth a snoop for $10 bucks.

There isn’t much accommodation on site so its best to stay in Flagstaff as it has all the amenities and hotels around $25 per night. Even in June though the forest capped mountains her can be dusted with snow, so pack that fleece.
Nearby Humphreys peak tops out at 12,000 ft so you’re a third of the way up Everest in the town. Buses and trains are not the best out to the canyon so in the land of the car……….The train is a special tacky one that steams out to the edge for $40 along a 50 mile journey one way.

The North ridge is the highest and coldest viewing area and is only assessable from the one road and limited slices of the winter. The Coconino plateau offers the best views and campsites, although for every food and provisions store (hardly any here) there are five tacky souvenir shops.

After an hour of gawping over the edge and 200 photos (all the same) you are ready to take a breath and move on. Other options need to be booked up in advance, donkey trecks around a month in high season.
Light plane and chopper flights start at around $80 and seem to be for posers who do that sort of thing where ever theres something famous to dive-bomb. You can walk down to the river, but it takes around six hours one way, so bring a tent.
I fancied the rafting, but it was low season with the current about as dangerous as Dale Winton in a boxing ring (steady). When it’s white, the water is the best commercial raft in America and attracts some serious rapid heads.

It can be foggy up there in spring so try and avoid Feb through til April if you can. This is when the desert dries and steams like a New York drain, on a particularly steamy day. But when the sun is out and the morn crisp you will never see anything so awesome and wide in your whole insignificant life.
Its incredibly quiet and still to, as the shimmering view is relentless and passive as if some great oven had been opened. You can probably go to noisier Amish wakes.

Now your not supposed to lob rocks of the top, but if you cant resist it, the drop rate is a full 34 seconds to the bottom, give or take a bounce or two. One pebble could smash through a Ford Ka at that velocity you know. Well those cars are always driving around the desert on those ads, aren’t they.

It’s the Ayres rock of North America and you have to go see it in the heart of nowhere. Its about a half day s out from LA and three or so hours from Phoenix and Vegas.The whole area is lavished with stunning national parks and scenery every way you turn.
Theres a particularly virulent volcanic strata and landscape in the area, let alone exotic desert fauna and mystery. The Indians won’t cut you of at the pass as most of them are building casinos or getting pissed, or both.